6 weeks pg...

... and shattered. Exhausted. Bloody hell! Feel sick a lot of the time, feel hungry, feel like I can't do anything after lunch, and as soon as they are in bed I'm in my pyjamas, and am getting into that trance-like sleep around 9pm. Edward waking sometimes 3.50am, sometimes 5.30am... hardly ever 6am. Her behaviour through the roof. Refusing to do things. Saying 'no' and 'I don't want to' to everything. E.g. this morning trying to leave for group, wouldn't go to the toilet, wouldn't brush teeth, wouldn't put shoes on... cue me absolutely on my knees just getting the two of them into the car, obviously late, for a toddler group.

Told my counsellor this week that I'm pregnant. Stress with work still ongoing. Have contacted my union rep now, and although the original email was acknowledged she hasn't got back to me in any meaningful way.

We've seen a house for sale within touching distance. Near to the school. Next-door to Claire and Rebecca. Probably out of our price-range but close enough to make us think. Going to see it on Saturday. Could possibly borrow from our parents to bridge the gap. Have been in touch with mortgage company and they will lend us a limited amount.

Got my appointment with the chiropodist this afternoon and in a sad way am really looking forward to making some progress on getting my feet better!

pregnant #3!

Well, that Tuesday (5th January) saw me testing, half way through Holby City, with husband in tow. We left the test, in time-honoured fashion, on the back of the cistern, for the required two minutes, and I didn't even really need to look when we returned to the bathroom. Pregnant! I had utterly convinced myself anyway, and have been tired and feeling a bit sick but mainly hungry, and Edward hasn't been feeding in quite the same way, so all pointers suggested that I was. I had my appointment with a nurse last week to register the pregnancy with the GP, and now have to wait for the midwife team to make contact. They told me my due date was:

September 14th 2010

Seems like a long way off at the moment, but as these things do I'm sure it will soon be here.

Had my 'talkabout' session at the hospital to go over Edward's birth, and was disappointed to hear I'll probably have to have this baby at the consultant unit (again!!) unless I can make a good case why not. Will have to try to be really assertive this time. Dreading telling all the relatives though, they weren't exactly pleased the first and second time so I'm sure the response is going to be at best negative!! Husband's Mom has already said 4 grandchildren is enough, they are expensive enough as it is!!

We've had snow snow snow all week. Well, it snowed at the back end of last week, and because of the really cold temperatures it didn't thaw, and we've been left with ice and snow for nearly a week. It snowed again yesterday, but it seems warmer today, and finally I think it is shifting!

snow on the first morning of pre-school!

We dashed to get ready this morning, but were beaten by snow! From about 8am it came down fairly thick and fast, so we had to drive slowly and were caught up in the school-run traffic, so finally dropped Elizabeth off at nursery about 10 minutes late. It was great that they seemed to be expecting her, and showed her her drawer with her name on. She took off her shoes, hugged me, then disappeared into the room and Edward and I made our way back into the snow!

He's now having his morning nap, and I'm just sitting with a mug of hot chocolate in the peace and quiet. I have been with her almost constantly from birth - 14 months before I went back to work 1 day a week, then about 9 months of having one day apart from her, then another 13 months' continuously with her. I can't really believe that she's elsewhere and someone else is responsible - a very strange feeling! Well - on with my New Year's Resolutions - am going to try to assemble the holiday 2009 montage now...

Happy New Year - will 2010 be the year we have a third baby?!!

Well, Christmas flashed by in a whirlwind. Husband finished work, we visited Aunty Mary (Sunday), Dave and Claire and new baby (Monday), Gran (Tuesday), my Nan (Wednesday) then it was Christmas Eve (Thursday) and we had to go and buy a shirt for husband and get final bits and bobs from the town centre, then Friday was Christmas Day. If I remember correctly Edward had a reasonable night, and we were up at around 7am to open Christmas stockings. All showered and dressed then downstairs for croissants and pain au chocolat, and then opening of the tree presents. Doing the dinner at home and not having to go anywhere worked well. My family came over, I was cooking from around 10am (even though we only had a turkey crown and not a full-blown turkey), and although we were supposed to eat at 1pm we ate at 1.20pm. Edward has his afternoon nap, then they opened more presents - Elizabeth found her bike behind the settee, but was probably more taken with the £5 Tesco doll! Edward opened up his garage and seemed to like it. The family all came round in the evening once we'd got Edward and Elizabeth off to bed. We watched the Devon DVD and they ate the sausage rolls I'd made. We had some really nice presents - Nigel Slater cookery book from Amy and Chris (plus DVD and homemade biscuits), knife sharpener and necklace from Carley and Stu, shirt from Dad plus Rachel Allen cookbook, James Martin cookbook from Mum... Boxing day was spent at home again, and we took Elizabeth out on her bike for a walk around the block. Carley and Stu came over with Amy to give their presents to the children, then on the Sunday husband went out to see Avatar in 3D at the cinema with Mum, Dad, Carley and Stu. I was pretty upset about it (blame hormones!) as even though I didn't want to see Avatar, wouldn't have minded if someone had wanted to come over to see me... as it was, watched Casualty and went to bed. Monday I think we went to the shops to take pre-Christmas clothes back, and Tuesday we went out in the evening with Amy and Chris, Wednesday they went home and we went to Enginuity in Ironbridge, then Thursday was New Year's Eve and husband's Dad's 80th. We piled over to Cannock for our buffet lunch and presented FIL with his photobook. Came home and watched a strange DVD (The Hangover) - still can't seem to get the New Year DVD comedy thing right! Didn't see it in - went to bed at around 11am. New Year's Day saw my parents - actually went over to them! Hadn't been there in literally months. Watched the other DVD that night - Burn once read - supposedly a comedy too although we didn't get it. Saturday - The Moat House for 80th Celebration Meal, and Sunday to the town centre again to take back my perfume and jumper, and husband's tie. Phew!! He's back at work today, and we've been to Sainsbury's to buy a new frying pan...

No sign of my period. So - we tried on 16th, 19th, 20th and 22nd December and period should be due around 7th. Am almost positive I am pregnant - feel hungry and faintly sick, but more worrying the itching has returned on my thighs and upper arms, at a low level, in the early evening.